June, 2020 – “Why does it always seem to take our world being turned upside down before we recognize ourselves in each other? . . . A thoughtful reflection written by a Lenten Challenge participant & HSHC supporter Ann M. Frensley.

The Lenten Challenge was timely for me and affirmed much in my spiritual journey of the past two years. While it is easier for me to avoid the difficult questions, to even deny the necessity of them, what I learned by staying with those questions during this season of Lent is significant. I prayed for deeper discernment and wanted to reflect with greater intention on the questions. I did not want to throw down rote responses.

What did my relationships look like? Did they feel authentic? Had I been authentic, i.e., honest, patient, present, vulnerable, forgiving? God knows I lack patience sometimes, especially with family. I thought I knew what to expect by asking for deeper discernment. Ha! After reading the daily reflections, I wrote them in my journal to revisit later. I was surprised by my responses as the prayer for depth began to open up to me. But I was uncomfortable. It had not always been easy to be honest with my thoughts and feelings, even to myself. I experienced life differently from others.

The Challenge offered an opportunity to be authentic, my true self before God, my family, and friends. It might be too much to ask from me. Could I allow myself to be vulnerable, answer honestly, even to myself? The ugly and uninvited, vicious and deadly coronavirus thrust itself into the midst of Lent, taunted and dared me to reexamine my relationships and my responses to the Lenten Challenge with more urgent intention. The cause and effect that the pandemic was having on so many lives was affecting me, my community, and the entire world. The event was expanding exponentially and holding humanity emotionally hostage. Why was this happening? How long will we have to be separated? Life will surely be different. But how? No answers. Doubts? Many. I missed my weekly interactions with people I had come to know and was aware of how much I had relied on facial expressions, gestures, and body language in conversations. Visual cues and tone of voice do not exist in emails and texts. Virtual face-to-face encounters are helpful and can brighten my day, but nothing compares with the actual presence of a loved one, a friend, a confidante. It has not been easy for me to accept the loss of physical presence, and I grieve it like a death. Whatever the pandemic serves up, I can still choose how to respond, but I’ve had a hard time with that.

The unexpected has burdened me with many questions. How can I communicate with others in a clearer and more conscious way? How can I create new ways to be present from a distance and celebrate meaningful moments of intimacy in my relationships, and for how long? What’s next? Why me? Why us? Why now? Can I manage to be kinder to myself? Maybe the seasons of Lent and Pandemic occurred together so I can appreciate how fragile and interconnected my relationships are. I must celebrate them now in as many imaginative and creative ways as possible. Why does it always seem to take our world being turned upside down before we recognize ourselves in each other?

Easter was celebrated differently this year, and I celebrate the Resurrection from a new perspective. I have another chance to renew my relationships, soften tough scars, forgive and be forgiven, reconcile with and be kinder to others and to myself. I continue to hold the questions with no answers in tension with hope and the expectation of clarity.

In Letters to a Young Poet, Rainier Maria Rilke wrote, “…be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and… try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”

Ann M. Frensley April 2020

June, 2020 – Anna Grace Clauch, HSHC intern, interviewed Maggie Burgess, a seminarian spouse who originally hails from Wyoming. She is passionate about health equity, immigration, and coffee. Maggie has worked a variety of positions in the non-profit sector and is involved on campus with the HSHC small group and SAGE (CTS students group) community garden. Here is what she said when I asked her about her experience with HSHC this past semester…

Small-Group Participant Maggie Burgess
“Attending HSHC’s small group each month was a breath of fresh air — a much-needed time of honest conversation and new perspectives on daily living. I felt welcomed as a non-student and LOVED each plant-based meal we shared together. I especially enjoyed our discussion of rest and the expectations we place on ourselves and our churches. I’m grateful for the diverse perspectives of the group and the thoughtful leadership of HSHC. “

– Maggie

June, 2020 – HSHC’s student intern, Anna Grace Claunch, graduated from Columbia last month. She served as our intern for the past two years and we are thrilled that she will now be on HSHC’s board of directors! Anna Grace is currently moving to Pelham, New York, where, at the end of the month, she will begin a year-long residency at Huguenot Memorial Church (Pelham, NY).

She is eager to show her new congregation the many ways in which one’s faith and health overlap, and teach them how to live more fully into a life of wholeness, not only for themselves, but for the world in which we live.

Trail Notes – June 2020

June, 2020 – I clearly remember the day when I interviewed for the Th.D. in pastoral counseling program at Columbia Theological Seminary. This was something I very much wanted, and I was quite nervous! During the interview, I had the opportunity to speak with many of the professors with whom I was hoping to study.

I distinctly remember one part of that interview in particular. I was describing the work of Healthy Seminarians-Healthy Church, and how that informed my academic interests. One of the professors, thinking about what I had said, asked, “How does that work apply to black bodies?”

That was a good and insightful question, and one we still wrestle with, especially given recent events – the deaths of Ahmaud Arbery, Rayshard Brooks, George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and so many more – that prove yet again how our culture, our church, this organization, and I, as a human being, struggle with the value of black lives and black bodies.

The Bible repeatedly offers a vision of constructive unity in a blessedly diverse world. But, like so many aspects of the divine kingdom, it is one that we are far from living into fully. In the meantime, people keep dying, and living in fear, and suffering in ways both large and small.
Intentionally or unintentionally, I am part of the system that makes this happen. The “intentionally” aspect of this is bad enough, but it is the“unintentionally” part that especially scares me and makes me realize just how much work I have to do around this manifestation of sin in my own life. Wendy Farley, professor of spirituality at University of Redlands, writes:

“Sin damages human beings and their communities by diminishing their capacity to perceive injustice, to experience compassion, and to perceive right from wrong. People participate in the process through which they are dehumanized by evil, acquiescing to it, accepting it…

This is the characteristic way sin functions: it corrupts the environment in which human beings must act and deceives them about their real situation… (it) so deeply infects a community that every action is tainted and corrupt… (it) becomes a kind of bondage that entangles human beings and communities even before they choose or desire evil.”

How blind am I? How often do I choose evil without realizing it? What kinds of evil do I tolerate, accept, even sanction? Too much, too often, too many.

The good that comes from this, I hope, is lasting structural change, and that lasting structural change starts with difficult, and ongoing, self-examination, confession, (hopefully) forgiveness, and commitment to something both different and far healthier. The time for this came long ago. I pray for the courage, finally, to live into this call.

Peace,
Travis Webster
HSHC Co-Founder

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me.”

April 2020 – Written by Anna Grace Clauch, HSHC Intern

I recently asked Sally Foster, who has been involved in HSHC throughout her time in seminary and is a regular participant in our Moving in Wholeness small group, to reflect on how she was handling the pandemic. This is what she shared with me….

“When Covid-19 began to redefine our lives everywhere and especially at CTS with staff and working from home and classes converted to online in a matter of days, I began to think very seriously about what I was going to intentionally do to make sure I was as healthy as possible.

Not being a “spring chicken” this is particularly important for me. I am blessed with not having any underlying health conditions, so now is the time for me to practice what I preach.
What I have realized about myself during this time is that I do not have any more excuses for not eating healthy and not exercising. I decided that not only because of Covid-19, but because it was the right thing to do, that I would walk around my neighborhood for 30+ minutes a day.

With the stay-at-home orders this was going to be very doable. I love walking outside and especially in my neighborhood as we have lots of trees and beautiful scenery. I have thoroughly enjoyed my walking as I have felt healthier, lost weight, toned up and met some new neighbors and dogs while I have been out and about.

Also, in eating healthier, I have focused on eating fish versus a lot of meat and I am eating a lot of fruit and vegetables with an occasional piece of chocolate!! I am a Lifetime member of Weight Watchers, so I decided to become more disciplined in tracking what I was eating, going to meetings (virtually), and drinking enough water.

All in all, despite the restrictions of going out, I have tried to focus on positive activities to stay healthy.”

April 2020 – When I (Travis) was growing up, and we had discussed an unpleasant subject for too long, my mother would redirect the conversation by saying, “Let’s talk about butterflies.” I don’t know about you, but I have consumed plenty of information about the coronavirus and the profoundly negative impact it is having on the world around us. Not to hide from reality, but I need a break! Perhaps it is time to talk about butterflies.

This spring has been absolutely stunning in Georgia. The blooming trees and flowers have been beautiful. The weather has generally been wonderful. While spending time in our garden last week, one of our hummingbird friends let us know it was time to set out our feeder for the season. Moreover, since we let our springtime backyard grow until the daisies go to seed, we also noticed that some of our favorite butterflies had returned.

Seeing the butterflies last week was very fitting, especially given that it was the first week of the Easter season. Butterflies symbolize:

Abrupt change: prior to mid-March, most of us were carrying on in our routines (the equivalent of a caterpillar just munching on its leaves), when everything suddenly came to a screeching halt. Now, people all across the world have been asked to embrace these changes – physically, emotionally, socially, spiritually, environmentally, etc. – while we shelter in place (forced to spend time in our cocoons, wondering what we and the world will look like when we are finally able to emerge).
Mystery: our expectations of how life is supposed to be have been completely altered, and we don’t know how God is going to use this situation (just like the mystery of how a caterpillar becomes a butterfly).
Transformation: we recognize that neither we, as people, nor the creation are the same as we were a month ago, and we will not be the same in the months to come. Seeing the butterflies reminds us of how something so magnificent comes from an ordinary caterpillar. As Christians, as Easter people, we trust that the God who brought resurrection from crucifixion can also work miracles in and through our current situation.

Christ is Risen! This fact offers us new life and new hope in the midst of our uncertain present and into the future.

Peace,
Karen and Travis Webster
HSHC Co-Founder

“For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope.” Jeremiah 29:11

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

January 2020 – by Anna Grace Clauch

In fall 2019, HSHC launched a new program called “Prepare & Share.” The purpose of this meal program is to give students and the greater CTS community the opportunity to try out a variety of new and healthy recipes, share meals with friends, and cook less often while still enjoying home-cooked meals.

Lucas Jones, a CTS student, shared this with me when I asked him to reflect on his experience so far…

“HSHC’s food sharing program was certainly a highlight of my fall semester. Our weekly meals gave me the opportunity to enjoy table fellowship with a group of students and professors, and also try new and healthy recipes in a fun a supportive setting. I look forward to continuing in the spring.”

January 2020 – Sarah Smith, CTS Alum 2017

While pastoring in Northern Ireland, I joined a typical gym where you walked in, did your workout, and really didn’t speak with anyone. I worked out there for about a month, and then there was snow. . . I didn’t go back.

I started attending a different gym where class instructors and the owner learned my name. Soon, working out was no longer something I had to do, but something I looked forward to each day. I was living in a new country, and had no friends, and this community changed all of that for me.

Through my journey with this community, my fitness level, attitude toward fitness, and approach to food and fitness totally changed. I love working out, and my day doesn’t feel complete without a workout. I also enjoy eating healthy, and taking care of myself, both mentally and physically. With the support of my fitness community, I was able to hike the highest peak in Northern Ireland. The owner still checks in on me and makes sure that I am keeping up with my fitness and healthy lifestyle.

Community is huge. Find a community where you feel encouraged, supported, nourished. Find people who will walk alongside you and fill you up instead of depleting you. Who fill your life with joy, happiness, love, support, and encouragement. We were created to be in community with each other. Take time to build relationships. It may change your life.

Peace,
Sarah